Heading to see Stephan Speaks to better understand how to rid myself of toxicity for a better me happened yesterday, October 17. I was fresh and ready after arriving home from a 5-day cruise to the Bahamas. I thought “this is freaking cool” to finally witness in person how this phenomenal speaker-, relationship coach could deposit nuggets for me to use and apply to my personal life.
I left with a resourceful takeaway that will help me to understand ‘why it is that my headaches recur’ when I am among certain family? The throbbing mostly seems like a constant when her repetitive calls go unanswered that regularly results in unexplained confusion, hurt, and frustration because when I do decide to answer the phone it’s stress about the ‘why, where, what, how and when’ and never about how we can heal us or our family to function in normalcy. Conversely, when I don’t answer the phone it’s the constant voicemails from her about how I need to stay in my lane and not question anything she says or does, although her actions systemically and negatively impacts others. Yet, she never forgets to tell me how my life will be “shortened” because I am that child who supposedly talks back. Ahem.
I can never win with this petite, 5’2″ lady, who is my mother. Therefore, I find it therapeutic to block her phone number instead to exercise peace of mind for me and mine, who stands witness to this dysfunctional relationship. So, attending the function yesterday reaffirms the importance of healing, which “is an emotional detox,” while the other nugget I find useful is to “learn that life is happening FOR you and not TO you!”
Associations, i.e. friendships, relationships, and acquaintances are usually developed from individual comfort levels from within. For instance, two people meeting for the first time who share a mutual understanding about an issue will likely grow closer to one another because of common knowledge or experience. To the contrary, if there is
His Child, Not Hers 